Tuesday, April 5, 2011

choosing life

I came across an article in which in a women details the abortion of her first child, a little boy who was diagnosed with Downs Syndrome at 22 weeks gestation. I was soooooo mad after reading it I almost couldn't think straight. As I write this, my son is doing somersaults (or hiccuping or something wild) in my belly. I say without a shadow of doubt in my mind that if Dr. Crosslin were to look at me tomorrow and tell me he was going to be born with an illness I would not even contemplate not bringing him into this world. 

I can't say that there aren't extreme circumstances in which that may be a reasonable option, I pray I never have to make that choice. I write not in judgment of this woman and her choice, but from the aching heart of a mother who can't imagine feeling my little boy kick and roll and punch one day and then willingly ending his life the next.


This is what my sweet baby boy looks like today. I can't imagine waking up tomorrow and deciding that whatever difficulties he would be born with would be too much to cope with. Perhaps what frustrates- and pains me- most is that this woman did not give God a chance to work in her child's life. I worship the one true God, the Great Physician and Healer. I watched two people I love very dearly receive a terrifying diagnosis when they were 30 weeks pregnant with their little boy. That sweet boy was born with a condition worse than the doctors had originally thought. I spent hours on my knees weeping and crying out loud to God to heal that precious boy's heart and make him whole. And He did. Luke is whole in Heaven today. Luke's mom and dad had the faith to believe that their God heals. They knew that if Luke lived his earthly life would be hard but that he was created by God on purpose and for a purpose and would fulfill an amazing calling. In fact, I think he managed to do more for the Kingdom in his 12 days than most of us do in 90 years. God reached the hearts of the more than 200,000 people who followed his story and countless others who rededicated themselves or came to Christ for the time. What if the Sextons chose not to birth Luke?

I sit here now wondering what kind of testimony the precious little boy from the article would have had. How would he have changed the world? Would he have won the 100 yard dash in the Special Olympics? Would he have been a tutor to other Downs Syndrome children? My heart aches over this but I find great comfort in knowing that the precious baby boy is being held in the arms of a loving Savior as we speak. He'll never stress over paying a mortgage, being teased at school, having his heart broken by love or losing someone he loves to death. If he had lived though, God would have used all of those trials to create a beautiful testimony.

It's no secret that I believe strongly on this matter. Serving on the board of a pregnancy center gives that away before I even mention my commitment to serve God more fully. There are no words to express the joy that fills my heart when I think about holding my sweet boy in less than 17 weeks. Even when I wish I was asleep at 4:30am, I can't help but smile as he kicks and stretches. I love the look in my husband's eyes when he feels our boy kick and watches my whole tummy bounce as our boy practices what must be baby tai-bo (he's got a mean kick!). There's truly nothing cooler in the world, except actually holding your baby, I guess. :)

Life just isn't easy. We were never promised that it would be. What God did promise was that we wouldn't have to do it alone. I pray you don't quit when circumstances are overwhelming. Sometimes the easy way out has the hardest consequences to deal with. When we lean on God for strength and keep trudging through as the waters rise, the reward is so great- often on earth, but definitely in Heaven. I have seen God heal in ways that are so supernatural He's the only one who could receive the glory for it. Pray those "sun stand still" prayers like Joshua did as he led the Israelites to battle. When we pour out all of our self, God is quick and willing to fill us with is power. 

Pray for healing for women who did not choose life. And while you're at it, pray for your local pregnancy center as they work to share God's love to their communities and encourage women to choose life. Be careful what you pray for though- you just mind end up knee-deep in that amazing ministry serving as a board chair, washing tubs and tubs of baby clothes and wishing you could give more each month. :)


Joshua 10:12-14 (NIV)

 12 On the day the LORD gave the Amorites over to Israel, Joshua said to the LORD in the presence of Israel:
   “Sun, stand still over Gibeon,
   and you, moon, over the Valley of Aijalon.”
13 So the sun stood still,
   and the moon stopped,
   till the nation avenged itself on[a] its enemies,
   as it is written in the Book of Jashar.
   The sun stopped in the middle of the sky and delayed going down about a full day. 14 There has never been a day like it before or since, a day when the LORD listened to a human being. Surely the LORD was fighting for Israel!

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